For a long period in my depression I blamed factors, events and people outside of myself for my situation. I wanted someone or something to be responsible for what had happened to me. I became bitter at those people who mentally abused me for years. I used a lot of my time, energy and focus to direct my anger and bitterness towards them.
But, here’s the catch: bitterness never healed me.
Hear me out. I certainly believe there’s a time to be angry at our wrongdoers, it seems a natural response in some sense. But, if that develops into some kind of bitterness we’re starting to damage ourself instead of healing ourself.
What I found is that no matter how right we might be when we put the blame and responsibility on our wrongdoers they will not be the ones to come and fix us in our present now. Nor will they in the future.
When I with help from my therapist realized there’s empowerment in taking responsibility for my own situation I was finally able to start dealing with my pain and hurts. I’m not to blame for what happened to me in the past, but I can still take responsibility for what happens from this day on.
The hurts are mine. I’ve chosen to do something about them. I choose healing.